Coffee for thoughts
by Izzu
Summary: Team Batista. Post Ariadne. Shiratori had some thoughts over the things that happened over a cup of coffee.


Just something random. I tend to have a habit of breaking into another fandom for some break. Not even have a proper purpose for this, just wanted to write on Shiratori and Hayami.

Based on the TV Drama version.

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><p><span>Coffee for thoughts<span>

Written by Izzu

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Losing someone important to you; be it a lover, a family member... or a very good friend, was painful. Having to watch from the sidelines, not being able to do anything to help; was even worse than that. Even though _death_ was something inevitable—all of us would certainly die someday after all—the thought of something like that happening to the ones you cared most... was something he would rather, not experience too often.

That was probably the reason why he had first decided to go into the medical school and aspiring to become a doctor. He _wanted_ to be able to make a difference, to at least be able to help out. Well, that was... until that Johto Supermarket fire incident. He realised that there was something... _else_ that he could do. Something that he should be able to do, to realise the wishes that he had; because things like that... he rather not putting that responsibility on another person. Because it was something he wanted to make happen, to change—thus the only way for _that_ to happen was for him to do it himself. That meant giving up his aspiration to becoming just another doctor.

Though, it was not as if he regretted that decision. The things he had learnt while in medical school was still fresh in mind, even if he was mostly out of practice. He still have that Doctor's license after all. And his line of work did not stray that far, considering he was working under the Ministry of _Health_, Labour and Welfare. The things he was given charge on kept piling one after another, but that was nothing.

But going back to the initial thought—a lot of things happening _did _affect him in many ways. He admitted that he did not have that many _friends_ but for the ones he still had, well... he would like to think that he treasured them in his own way.

To lose any one of them would be something he would not be able to handle well. It was enough that he had lost that one person he loved very much all those years ago. It had been painful not being able to do anything for her, not even knowing what was the true cause of her death. That was why... even if his job mainly focusing on people who were already dead, if the things he do could help people accepting the sudden loss of their loved ones—it would be fine. No matter how much he would be hated for the things he did; if his investigations could reveal any malpractice; misdeeds... or even just confirming any certain fact over any deaths, he would gladly take on such task. Because that was just the things that he could do. If that meant that he would have more enemies than friends, so be it.

He would not care much about what happened to his enemies, but should anything happened to any of his friends...

Well, people could see how he would react when something like that happened. Even though they probably would not think that he was being concerned. He could bet that mostly everyone did not think that he cared as much as they had when Hayami had been hospitalized. Not that many of them knew how close he was with Hayami, and how it had devastated him not being able to do anything to help Hayami. As a doctor, that is. Perhaps that was the only thing he regretted about not being able to become an actual doctor. Even if the things he learnt was still remembered, he would not dare to use it again for fear of causing a life to slip away. His skills as a doctor was mostly on paper after all.

Thankfully, Hayami's condition that time ended up not being so bad and he managed to survive it still. Same as Gucchi... when he had been shot. Honestly, it has been a while since he had panicked like that. Thinking back now, if anything should happened to either Hayami or Gucchi; he would probably not be able to bear with it. Not many had been able to work that well with him all this time, Hayami and Gucchi were among the few he could actually get along with. To lose either one of them, it would feel like losing one's family member. Surprising how things ended up happening. Hayami was another story but to think he had gotten so used to having Gucchi around to the point he ended up being so attached to him...

A cup of coffee was promptly placed on the table in front of him as someone nudged him from the sides. Shiratori Keisuke snapped out of his deep thoughts as he looked up towards his friend. Hayami Koichi just shrugged at him as he took a seat opposite him.

"What was that you've been thinking just now? Don't tell me you came all the way here just to have coffee?"

Shiratori grinned at him. "Was it surprising to see me visiting you, Hayami? Can't I even do that?"

Hayami leered at him before shrugging.

"Well, I at least hoped that you didn't just drag me out of my work just for some needless reasons. Not everyone had so much free time as you."

Shiratori clutched his chest in mock reaction. "Touché. But truthfully, I just happened to pass by and I'd like to also spend some time off not thinking about work. And your place was nearby! I called that convenient."

Hayami gave him that look again as he snorted.

"So... how things been going for you? I heard a bit about that trouble you had in Tojo earlier."

He shrugged. "Ah... well, it was handful I had to admit. And quite a scare too after what happened to Gucchi. But at least now, it turned out well in the end", he said before Shiratori sighed. "Though... it was sad to think that things only start to change after some big incident like this. Honestly...!"

Hayami chuckled.

"Perhaps that should tell you to stop hanging around Tojo anymore."

Shiratori grinned. "No? And it's not as if I could help with that, being in my line of work. And Tojo had a _special_ place in my heart. Even without my Bureau Chief or Director Takashina pushing me with some more extra work, I would have still do anything without arguing."

Hayami just shook his head in amusement.

"But you know Hayami, I've been wondering... if I have not changed my mind and continued being a doctor—what could have happen now, I wonder?"

Hayami turned to look at him.

"I don't see you the type to over-think something to that extent. What? Starting to regret things?"

Shiratori just cocked his head to one side. "Nah. Just wondering. It was a pain not being able to do _anything_ despite knowing about it. And people don't usually listen to what I said whenever I wanted to suggest about anything _medical._"

Hayami sneered at him. "What did you mean you did _nothing_? You still _helped_, right? In your own way, you _did_ do something. That's how you've managed to solve everything until now. It's not just because Taguchi-sensei had been there. Are you doubting yourself now? Did you forgot how you managed to handle things well until now?"

Shiratori grinned. "Arara... can't I even feign depressions with you? You're no fun. But you know, occasionally I'll start to wonder. Some time ago, someone suddenly raised the topic about Kaori and well... considering what I've done so far; riling everyone up before jumping into the problem. Even if I managed to solve all the resulting problems, all this enmity against me going to start affecting me someday. Gucchi said something to make me feel better about it, but I had to wonder how the rest of the people would react if they also knew. Like that Ikaruga, they'd probably think I'm setting my revenge to the medical world for my own satisfaction. Under the pretense of finding the truth, to want to bring down the system using underhanded means..."

"—are you the type to even_ care_ what people thought of you?"

Shiratori leered to Hayami. "Ah... you're right. Like I cared what they think. Though... occasionally it'll stung. Izumi-sensei was still that blunt to me. I wonder if she could ever treat me nicely..."

"Don't get your hopes up," said Hayami as he stood up to head towards the coffee machine. Shiratori jumped a bit as Hayami placed a hand on his shoulder.

"You're just fine where you are, Shiratori. It's a good thing to have you up there at the Ministry. Things couldn't have turned out better than that. And as for your other issues... don't think about it so much. Even if you can no longer practice as a doctor... you can still help out, isn't it? If not because of you, would I still be around now?"

"I guess you're right. Your team would have not been able to do anything if I haven't told them to tackle the problem differently," Shiratori heaved a long sigh. "Talking to you _is_ different than talking to Gucchi after all. Guess this trip was not a waste after all."

Hayami turned towards Shiratori.

"Heh, I can't imagine you'd be such a sentimental person. What, did you missed me suddenly? This was not like the usual Shiratori I know."

Shiratori leaned on his chair. "Well... yes. After that incident between Medical Assort and you last time as well as this recent one, I can't help being nervous. I don't have that many friends after all. You two were the few friends I had after all..."

Hayami laughed as he slapped Shiratori's arm. "You mean the _**only**__ friends_ you have still. Hnn, interesting... to see you being frantic like this."

Shiratori made a face at him.

"As if you've never seen me frantic. But hey, I'm not that hopeless! I just find it a shame if I lose friends like you or Gucchi. Not everyone could bear with my personality like both of you could."

Hayami smirked as he pulled out a candy from his coat pocket. He popped it into his mouth before turning back towards Shiratori.

"Don't falter. Aren't you making a difference in _this_ world in your own way? Don't just worry about others and neglecting yourself. Even your job, has its own purpose. Take care of yourself as well. It'll be trouble if something happens to you because of you thinking nonsense."

Shiratori smiled. "Yeah, I know. I just don't want to regret later if I haven't been nice at all to my friends and later something happens to them. I shouldn't have only memories of arguing with my friends to keep to myself. That'll be a sad thing, won't it?"

"Heh...! Hard to believe hearing this from you."

Shiratori shrugged. "Maa, be weird out all you want. I'm not that good about these kinds of things anyhow."

Hayami turned to look at him for a moment before shrugging.

"Shiratori. I won't make much fuss about it, but if there were things you cannot tell Taguchi... I could lend an ear. Or if you just want to have some coffee. Just don't come here again looking like this."

Shiratori grinned. "Thank you... Hayami-_sensei_."

"Take care of yourself properly. The dangers in your line of work was a lot different than the ones doctors like me faced everyday. You don't have that many friends after all, isn't it?"

Shiratori's eyes sparkled as he continued smiling. "Of course. That's why I'm glad to have you and Gucchi as my ally," he said before finishing his cup of coffee.

Because... to still have people you cared most, to still have something to protect; was a comforting thought. Even for someone like him.

_Especially_ for someone like him.


End file.
